Monday 10th August 2020
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Everything I use on my hair

Last week’s post on everything I put on my face got such a big response that I decided it might be fun to share my tonsorial products as well (and have you share yours in the comments, please). Hair is actually such an important part of my life that it’s surprising I don’t write about it more here—there’s a whole chapter in the book on it. Mine, left to its natural devices, is corkscrew-curly (I like how curls look on others, but not on me) and painfully thin. So I have extensions, and use this shampoo because it doesn’t eat away at the bonds.

You’re not supposed to use deep conditioners every time you shampoo, but my hair is so dry and damaged that I do; it just drinks this stuff up, and I’ve noticed a real change since I started using it.

I towel-dry my hair and then apply more of this than is probably recommended, but it is just so good: it detangles beautifully and leaves it feeling undamaged and even smooth.

This blow dryer is really fast, and lightweight too.

I heat style with a curling iron: even though the look I’m going for is relatively straight, I’ve been warned off of anything like a straight- iron. Still, to protect it from damage and to impart a little shine, I apply this before the iron goes through my hair.


I go section-by-section with my hair and run it all through this curling iron to get my hair as straight as it gets.


Posted on December 5th, 2017 70 Comments

70 Responses

  1. Candy says:

    Extensions? I want to hear more about that! Details on type and upkeep please! Seems like the minute I turned 50, my hair began to thin like crazy and I’m wondering if extensions could replace some of the fullness.
    I use Kevin Murphy shampoo and conditioner and some Moroccan oil on the ends. John Frieda Frizz Ease still is my favorite mousse, To be honest, though, I suck at hair styling. If I could, I’d get a blowout every week.

  2. Tammy says:

    I second learning about your extensions, Kim!

    I have curly hair and have learned to embrace it. I use Moroccan Oil curl shampoo and conditioner, or Bumble and Bumble Creme de Coco shampoo and conditioner. It’s best to use very little of this on my hair.

    I then apply Oribe curl gloss. This gloss is, without a doubt, one of the best products I’ve ever found. It leaves no crunch. Curly girls know what I’m talking about.

    I then use two sprays, one after the other. DevaCurl Set It Free spray and Sachajuan Ocean Mist. If I don’t have Ocean Mist, another sea salt spray is good.

    During the day if I need to refresh curls, I use the Davines products that are mentioned above by Kim. They smell SO fantastic!

    I always air dry and never use a brush or comb. Sometimes, I use a pick.

    • Dana D says:

      Same hair here, Tammy.

      I use whatever non-toxic shampoo/conditioner I can buy at the Co-op (I like the Acure products quite a lot). I also use Oribe, and HBL spray that I get at the salon when I go for a trim.

      I don’t color or style at all anymore except for trying to get some kind of decent curl. I put my long hair up two or three days a week and look at pictures of Linda Rodin whenever I get discouraged.

      My daughter uses the Davines and it smells so good I might splurge.

      I’m 55 and blessed with thick hair that doesn’t seem to be changing much but my feet are now one half size bigger…

      • Tammy says:

        I’ll be 51 next month and my hair still is thick.

        I do an all-over color or balayage twice per year and have my roots done more often.

        I get a trim once per year, out of state. My hair is shoulder length but I can’t find a local stylist worth a crap to cut my hair.

      • DeDe says:

        Davines products last a really long time, in my experience. Obviously my hair’s shorter than yours, but even when it was shoulder length I only went through a bottle of shampoo a year. In fact I have a bottle of the Alchemic stuff for gray hair that’s a year and a half old now (I *just* replaced the conditioner, not because it was empty but because it comes in a tub and after all that time it seemed to have gotten a little funky). It doesn’t look like you get much, but you don’t use much, either, so they’re a good value, imo. And the Oi stuff Kim has in her post will last you FOREVER.

        • Mamavalveeta03 says:

          I think that’s because Davines doesn’t use all of those toxic preservatives, DeDe. I have the Oi stuff, but my Oi smells like old lady. Could it be past it’s prime? Or is one’s Oi supposed to smell that way?

          • DeDe says:

            Yes, that’s exactly it. They used to use the regular preservatives, but since they took those out, products that come in tubs tend to go bad faster (but not so fast that they’re not worth the money, imho). Probably your Oi oil/milk is ok – the Oi aroma is just really, really strong! I use it anyway because it works, but it’s, um, quite powerful. A lot of people love the way it smells, but it’s just too Avon Lady for me personally. I wish they’d tone it down a little!

      • Liz says:

        Same here re the hair but I do color my roots monthly.

        My hair grows so fast but I only have time to color it twice a year.

    • Mamavalveeta03 says:

      Ooo!!! Gotta try the Oribe Curl Gloss. Thx, Tammy!

    • Kimberly says:

      Davines just reformulated their LOVE curl line. It is FANTASTIC! I did not like the old formulations at all, but this stuff is almost too good to be true. I have thick, unruly, frizzy curls. I’m using the new primer and curl control cream (in Florida humidity) and my curls are crunch-free perfection. I used the cream alone on 2 low humidity days and my hair was amazing. I can’t quite believe it. I usually use the purple Love or Oi conditioner and I tried the new curl Love conditioner and the mask and I like both. *I do NOT work for Davines, I swear!

    • Allison says:

      I am also sooo curious about extensions. Please tell us more!

      • KimFrance says:

        Not a whole lot more to say—you have to work really hard to keep the bonds from tangling because otherwise they’re hell to remove when that time comes. But they are so worth it to me.

  3. Sheila Murphy says:

    Okay, hair talk and aging, count me in. My hair is thin in a “holy crap am I balding?” way.
    I color bc that fattens it up. Also natural hair color is field mouse ash blond.
    I love GM Reverie Hair Milk and Mare spray. Also love Josh Rosebrook Balance shampoo and conditioner.
    I take Biotin and omega fish oil capsules to help things along.
    And while not head hair, Plume helped me grown brows and lengthen lashes.
    I airdray my short, angled bob so it is crazy wavy.

    • Tara says:

      Real talk: I’m 49 started noticing some thinning on one side five years ago and I had mushroom-cloud hair back in the day (a LOT of wavy/frizzy hair). Then my eyebrows started disappearing, and my hairline started thinning out. Realizing my “ignore it” M.O. wasn’t really helping I saw a dermatologist (nothing), endocrinologist (thyroid was fine, suggested Biotin, Iron and Vitamin D, possibly Rogaine) and then went to another dermatologist for a skin check and mentioned my eyebrows/thinning hair in passing and she said, “Oh yes, it looks like frontal fibrosing alopecia to me!”. There is no cure, but it can vary in intensity so there are topical steroids and other protocols you can try to slow progression. I still have a lot of hair (thank you, mushroom cloud) but we’ll see for how long! All this to say, don’t be afraid to reach out to a dermatologist/endocrinologist to get a medical evaluation–it’s better to preserve what you have while you can! I can always frame a couple of my Mariah Carey super big hair 90s shots I guess! 🙂

      • Mamavalveeta03 says:

        It makes me SO angry, tho, when doctors don’t take our concerns about our hair seriously. As if that’s a frivolous issue. A female dermatologist almost chastised me for worrying about my hair loss! (Luckily, it was due to surgery and it grew back.) And I know, I don’t have cancer…but ask any woman going thru chemo what her 1st worry is and you’ll hear “Am I going to lose all of my hair?” Not frivolous at all since it has so much to do with our self-image.

      • Sheila says:

        So true about seeing the doctor. I also love the framed Glamour Shot idea!

  4. Emily M. says:

    I also embrace my curls. I am a total Lorraine Massey, Curly Girl devotee. I never use shampoo, I just use conditioner to cleanse my hair and scalp. I use Tresemme Botanique, because it is cheap yet still has ingredients that I like, and no silicone. Then I scrunch with DevaCurl Light Defining gel, and that is it. I also air dry and never use a brush or comb.

  5. y.k. says:

    me too – mention of the extensions just jumped off the page – we need more info!

    i switch up shampoos often- Avalon, EO are most recent. i’m very fond of the Camellia deep conditioner by Innisfree – leaves hair very silky.

    i blowdry with my fingers, never a brush.
    for volume i love this powder called Dust it by Schwartzkopf Osis. it’s the only thing that really works for me.

  6. KimFrance says:

    Ok, the extensions: They’re by a company called Hair Dreams, and they are truly excellent but—be forewarned—VERY pricey. But if you’ve got badly thinning hair, as I do, they can really change your life. I get them redone a few times a year, and you do have to spend a decent amount of time keeping the bonds from getting tangled. Here is the website:

    • Clarissa Johnston says:

      Can you see the plastic parts of the extensions? I work with a woman who has thinning hair and extensions and you can see the plastic bar things where the hair is attached …or do your extensions work differently?

      I got a keratin treatment 6 months ago to deal with curly/frizzy in Texas humidity – worked amazing for 2 months, then pretty good for the next 4 months, getting another treatment in 2 days.

      I have tried biotin, collagen, vivisical and noticed no difference in my baseline thin fine hair. Anyone tried Rogaine for women?

      and yes to the feet getting bigger – someone told me if you have high arches they drop with age and that is why your feet get larger in size – definitely a first world problem but still annoying!

      • KimFrance says:

        Most of the extensions are near the back, bottom part of my head, so they’re not visible. But I have more in right now than usual, closer to the top of my head, and there are spots—if I part the wrong way—you can see them. You just have to be mindful of it.

  7. Cola says:

    I’ve got very fine, very thin, very dry, very curly hair. I’ve made peace with the curls, if only because they hide some of the fineness and the thinness.

    I too use Davines conditioner – I alternate between the Momo (for dry hair) and the white Love (for curly hair) and the purple Love (for frizzy hair.) I have to use a ton of conditioner everyday lest my hair become an unruly tangled mess. Well, even more than it usually is. I love how Davines gives a shout out to their suppliers – yellow melon extract from Mrs. Simonte’s farm in Dattilo, almond extract from Mr Assenza’s farm in Noto, and olive extract from Mr Messina’s farm in Ficarra. No idea of how much is in each, but still.

    Per Kim’s recommendation a year or so ago I also started using the Davines All in One Milk. It’s terrific. For of you who can’t get enough of it, Davines makes a hand cream with the same scent.

  8. Julie Lee says:

    Thank you so much for this post! I have naturally curly hair that I have been straightening since the 80’s. I used a curling iron until the mid 90’s and then switched to a straightening iron. I have always had pretty full hair, until the past 5 years and now it is getting painfully thin. My face is really square so I need the volume. Do the hair extensions give you volume at the top or just length? I need a little extra umph at the top to balance me out and even my old 80’s height techniques won’t work on this new flat thinning hair of mine.

  9. jackie cohen says:

    over 50 and naturally curly hair …
    Used Deva products for years but recently discovered Hairstory …. check it out
    Created by the guy who founded Bumble and Bumble ..Michael Gordon.
    Amazing stuff. It’s a cream but it replaces shampoo and conditioner and my hair stays clean for days!
    I use that and one of their styling products and that’s it. It’s pricey but lasts a good while and I only need 2 products!

    • Marcia says:

      I, too, have been a devotee of Hairstory for about a year now — and it has made my curly, dry, colored hair feel reborn. It’s softer, shinier and just healthier feeling. (so much easier too, with just the one bottle.) Since I mainly air dry most of the time and keep the curl, I follow up with their Hair Balm, and that is by far the best de-frizzing, curl-keeping styling product (and I’ve tried ’em all!) I’ve come across for curly hair types. Brilliant.

    • hb says:

      Hmm. I have been considering trying New Wash but keep hesitating. You might have pushed me over the edge!

      • Kimbersam says:

        I tried Hairwash and found it to be decidedly “meh”. It smells really nice tho’—like roses.

  10. Nicole says:

    Ooooh fun! Tell us about those extensions.

    I went grey at 21, and so, that’s like half my life. I color it because I just prefer it. And now it’s both the unfortunate combination of fine AND humidity reactive to fuzz. This can be remedied though.

    I am loyal (right now) to 2 things: either all Oribe or all Living Proof. I do not mix lines. From Oribe, the Gold Lust line is magic, and my hair drinks the oil without getting weighed down or heavy.

    However, at exactly half the cost, is Living Proof, which is some kind of miracle. I like the Full line for S&C, and the Perfect Hair day, followed by a drop of Split End Mender on the ends. No frizz, and volume. It’s magic.

    CHI brushes and the Dyson dryer and my other ride-or-dies. Early adopter on the dryer, I pre-ordered it. I like that it doesn’t get overly hot, and therefore doesn’t wreck my hair. Over time I’ve noticed there is just less damage. Which for me, is worth the price tag.

  11. Tamara WINAWER says:

    Not sure I’ve “embraced” my curls but I have surrendered to them (and Kim I actually remember yours from college, hehehe) deva products all the way for me…including their crazy monster hand diffuser and microfiber towel…also just ordered silk pillowcases in the hopes of reducing both frizz AND wrinkles…

  12. Liz says:

    Thanks for sharing. I have thick hair that is not so straight anymore. I use any organic / natural shampoo and conditioner preferably with coconut or tea tree oil. I then apply argan oil after I towel dry.

  13. c.w. says:

    Dittoing curly hair here also. I use DevaCurl products and have for about seven years now, but will look into the other curly hair products mentioned. I’ve also found the DevaCurl hair dryer and diffuser to really help add volume and curl, but not in an OrphanAnnie way––just better with much less frizz. I only shampoo my hair once a week––the rest of the time I “shampoo” my hair with conditioner. And occasionally, if I’m going out at night and my hair needs “freshening”––I dampen my hair with Mermaid Sea Salt Hair Spray (learned about it from I WANT TO BE HER). Once you hit menopause hair does thin. Oy and Egad.

    I should also mention that because my hair is grey/white the ends can turn yellow so I occasionally–maybe once or twice a month in the summer––use a combo of baking soda mixed with hydrogen peroxide into a paste and apply it to the ends of my hair, let it sit for a few minutes then rinse with apple cider vinegar (which is stinky, but the smell rinses away with conditioner).

  14. Dana says:

    The best hair tool I’ve ever bought in my life is a straightening brush; it’s a heated paddle brush. It makes my not-the-same-texture-in-differnt-places-on-my-head waves smooth but not flat, including the back. Every time I do my hair now it looks like I paid for a blow out. I got mine at Ulta for $50.

  15. joannawnyc says:


    I have fine thick frizzy mixed texture (wavy and curly and straight) hair. That is to say, parts on top are straight and and beneath are corkscrew curls, with waves in front and all of it frizzes. It’s also quite porous, so silicone cause more problems than in cures and natural oils soak in too much and give me grease.

    I tried heat straightening for a while in the 90s and could not cope with the frizz.

    Since then I’ve tried to work with my natural texture and calm the frizz. I usually like what I see in the mirror, don’t always like the photos (I feel like curly hair just adds to my general petite roundness), but hey. life isn’t a photograph.

    I’ve found that Davines, Living Proof and Oribe work well for me, but specific products, not the entire line (though MOST of the LP no frizz is good for me).

    The best thing that has happened was finding a stylist who cut my hair to be curly, not in the expectation that I would straighten the unruly sections. This has led to less handling and less frizz.


  16. Susanna says:

    I’ve had baby fine, thin, straight hair forever, but now that I double-process it to platinum, it has a lot more volume and body and doesn’t just sit flat on my head. Menopause and the processing, though, do mean that it’s thinning even more. On the upside, it’s no longer oily, so I don’t need to wash every day.

    I’ve mostly been using the Devacare No-Poo And One Condition products for a couple of years—my hair just can’t take a detergent at all these days. I use the EVO platinum blonde purple conditioner every week or two to rebalance the color. But lately, I’ve been using Hairstory’s New Wash to sub for both my cleanser and conditioner. I like a lot about it and do think it cleanses well, but I’m not sure I agree with their claim that it conditions well enough by itself. Does anyone else have thoughts about New Wash?

  17. Rebecca Too says:

    Hair is a tyranny.

    Like others, my hair is getting curlier and wavier as I age. And the color is fading. And I am fine with all of it (especially with the good advice found here in the comments!) but I am ever so tired of the comments…”long hair will make you look younger!” “try a flat iron!” “did you stop coloring your hair?”. Why is my existence an open invitation to comment on my hair (and all manner of other things)? This isn’t an original thought but I have been stewing on it recently.

    Why the rant? My hair is an overgrown mess at the moment and one of my oldest friends told me it made me look younger. Didn’t ask. Didn’t need that particular “affirmation”. Yes, it is more a comment about how she feels about aging than I do but…it made me want to shave my head.

    Thank you. Rant over. Going to find some of these frizz fighting products!

    • Heather says:

      Funny, I’m the opposite! My once-curly hair is now merely wavy. I’m trying to embrace the ‘beachy waves’ trend, but it’s more like ‘unruly straw’ at this point.

      I’ve also colored my hair since time immemorial — Manic Panic when I was in my teens, henna in my 20s, and now real covering-the-gray stuff. No idea what my natural color is, but like Sheila above, it’s probably field mouse.

      And yes about the open invitation to comment. For much of my life I’ve had strangers (often men) walk up and randomly ask “is that your natural hair color?” including one guy on an internet date. WTF and also, who cares?

      • Mamavalveeta03 says:

        Heather and Sheila, I’m totally field mouse, too. It went from a beautiful medium brown with auburn highlights to YUCK. Now I try to hold off as long as I can and have my roots touched-up About every 6 weeks (I’m tall, so my theory is that no one sees the top of my head) and balayage 2/yr.

        If I had CW’s beautiful silvery hair color, I wouldn’t be coloring mine. #jealous

  18. DeDe says:

    My hair is very similar to Joanna’s – too wavy to be curly, too curly to be wavy. It’s thick, mostly fine even with my gray (which I am duly thankful for), but tends to be dry. This is a really screwy hair texture to deal with. Curly Girl never worked for me. Mostly I just try to keep it looking healthy and presentable and kind of hope for the best – I mean, hair’s gonna hair, you know?

    I wash every other day with the Davines purple Love shampoo, which makes me think of Prince so that’s a bonus. I use the corresponding conditioner, too, which – I’ve been using Davines products for 14 years now, and no one has ever told me that the purple conditioner’s strictly for deep conditioning. It’s always been presented to me as a good conditioner for dry, curly hair. FWIW I’ve also used the Momo and curly Love shampoo/conditioners and think both of those are richer; they weigh me down really bad. So! Use it as often as you want! 😉 The purple pairing is literally the only wash/condition combo my hair will tolerate.

    After washing I usually style with the Davines curl serum and air dry. If it feels dry, I’ll just throw a little of the Oi oil at it instead. After sleeping on it overnight it’s straighter, so if it looks like it needs some direction in the morning I’ll use either the invisible serum (I think that’s what it’s called? I just discovered it recently – as in, last week) or the sea salt spray on it. Yes, I only use Davines. I’m not intentionally loyal, it’s just that their scents don’t bother me and none of their stuff has ever seriously fucked with my hair (except the crap they were making around 2003, that stuff was terrible).

  19. Mary Alice says:

    Lucky for me, my fine, thick, wavy hair has stayed the same throughout my 58 years. I suck at any sort of hair styling so when I was 16 I chopped it all off and it’s never been below my chin since. I love Purology products, they smell good and keep my blonde fresh. I use Orible Supershine Moisturizing cream worked through damp hair before I blow dry and I’m good to go.

  20. Mimi says:

    My once straight hair is now wavy, and I do everything I can to encourage curls and fullness. That starts with a genius layered (bob) cut every 6 weeks. I try new shampoos often in a neverending quest for a volumizing one since my hair has gotten thinner and finer as I’ve aged. Broo Thickening Shampoo is the current winner and it’s very inexpensive. I’ve recently replaced Oribe Surfcomber Mousse with DevaCurl Volumizing Foam. It goes on after I’ve washed my hair, then I scrunch Oribe Curl by Definition Crème through. It’s great at encouraging soft waves that aren’t crunchy. I blow dry my bangs, then let the rest mostly air dry and twist in a few rag rollers. When it’s dry I finish the look with a curling iron in 4 or 5 random places. The best thing I’ve found for reviving slept-on or hat-crushed hair is a Q-Redew Hair Steamer I found on Amazon. It takes only minutes. Moroccan Oil Hydrating Cream is also great for refreshing and definition. Sometimes I dump some Kevin Murphy Powder.Puff on a sparse spot. Not bald, please. Sparse. Davines Oi All in One Milk does nothing for me. I wish I could share my graveyard of rejected hair products with y’all. Kevin Murphy Hair.Resort Cream, anyone?

  21. Francine says:

    Ooooh, another product post. LOVE!

    I had thick wavy/curly hair – with frizz factor – which I have always embraced and loved! I started going grey in my late twenties and have colored/highlighted every since. Roots/refresh every 4 weeks, but gosh, I’d go every 2 if I could!

    I started getting a Brazilian Blowout (Keratin treatment) a few years ago. It’s helped a lot with the frizzies and cut down my prep time quite a bit. It also means I use a lot less products.

    – Keratin shampoo & conditioner, along with their mask
    – Keratin volumizer at the roots
    – a little bit of Bumble & Bumble anti frizz creme
    – I use a T3 dryer and Ibiza 4 round brush to smooth it out
    – 1″ curling iron to get smooth, beachy waves
    – Day 2 and Day 3, re fluff with Living Proof volume spray

    I take Viviscal but frankly, haven’t noticed an improvement. So sad to be thinning 🙁

  22. Anne says:

    My collarbone-ish length hair is oily, medium thick, but baby fine and has been stick straight until recently, when it has developed a bit of a wave. (thanks to all the comments, I’ve got some new tricks to try for air dry days!) I wash my hair almost every day and my go to for years has been Bumble and Bumble Thickening – Shampoo, Conditioner, Spray, and Contour Creme on the ends to keep things from flying around. I use a bit of Moroccan Oil on the wet ends a few times a week before I comb it out and I like to add some Surf Foam to my roots on humid days to keep things from going completely flat but need to revisit the Osis powder that one of the earlier commenters mentioned, totally forgot about that in my quest for the new and better. I use a round brush to style while I blow dry and finish up with a light mist of L’Oréal Ellnett hairspray as added insurance that things remain mostly out of my face and to keep the rest of the flyaways at bay.
    Trim and a highlight every 8-10 weeks to clean up the layers and brighten up the mouse brown hair color; bonus result of the highlight is the blending in of my greys!
    Other things I’ve been experimenting with are the Living Proof Perfect Hair Day dry shampoo (love), Ouai Wave Spray (love the result, don’t love the scent), and Don’t Blow it Air Dry from B&B. Have been using the L’Oréal Volume Filler Thickening products in an attempt to rediscover drugstore brands that work just as well at a fraction of the price. Figure that since they also own Kérastase, that high end hair technology must trickle down to their drugstore brands. I like it so far, but the test will be what my long time hair person says about the texture of my hair when I go in a few weeks. Anyone else on a drugstore brand quest? Just me?

    • Mamavalveeta03 says:

      You’re not alone, Anne. My budget says drugstore, but my heart says LUXE! I’ve like Aussie 3 Minute Miracle in the past, but I wish it still had its original scent.

  23. EW says:

    I did extensions for about 2 was awesome to look at but yes on $$…there is the initial install, and then a maintenance every 6 weeks ( take out busted bonds & replace); Only drawback was that it was a lot o hair and could get hot! also, expensive but you know that going in….I also missed swimming more in the summer. I had them taken out before a trip to the Caribbean

    Now I have clip in extensions for when I want to have the big volume hair…you can get them colored and cut for your style/head and then you use em when you want em.

    I have had a nice thick head for awhile but after losing a ton of weight this year, I was shedding like cat, the hair dermatologist said it was hormonal imbalance and will most likely stop and correct but if I wanted to do something he said to: use rogaine, take an older blood pressure pill that is known to grow hair(at a super low dose) and then get platelet rich plasma injection into the scalp, it really jumps starts the hair re-growing.

    I decided to wait it out and that how I came to get clip in extensions.

  24. Bethany A Ball says:

    I have ridiculously fine hair and I have for a long time. It’s fine and stringy. I used to say my hair was ten strands artfully arranged. I found this woman in my town who makes shampoo with real soap (vs. detergent, kind of like Dr. Bronner’s, I guess) and then these vinegar-like homemade rinses. My hair is transformed. I actually have some volume and texture. I was using crazy expensive salon shampoos that just weighed my hair down. Happy to find an alternative.

    If my hair gets any thinner with age I’m just going to buzz it off. 🙁

    • Christina says:

      I have the same type of hair! Is her shampoo/ rinse available online or over the phone? Would love to try it!

    • Catherine says:

      You described my hair. I’d love to try it too, if it’s available online?

      • Bethany A Ball says:

        Yes! I wasn’t sure but here it is:

        I use it on my 9yo too and have noticed a lot more texture and fullness. She also recommends buying a boar’s hair brush (no nylon) and brushing 100x a day or more to stimulate growth. My mother had said that’s an old wive’s tale but she swears by it. I don’t do it enough but I try.

  25. leahz says:

    I’ve embraced my wavy/curly hair in the last few years and used Deva Curl for a while, but got too much build up. Now my thick colored hair needs a little love…I use Kevin Murphy Angel wash, which is odd cause its for fine hair, but that’s what seems to work. Curly girl here all the way! Now if only the grey didn’t make me look so washed out

  26. Mamavalveeta03 says:

    This is probably a question best suited for Ira Flatow and “Science Friday,” but why does our hair turn curly (for so many of us, it seems) after menopause? I’m assuming it’s hormonal, but how is that connected to hair follicles or perhaps melanin?

    Mine went from super-thick with a slight wave, to thinning and curly/wavy. I had to learn a new way of handling it, so thankfully I found a hairstylist who is genius at cutting curly hair. I never blow dry anymore and when I’ve tried with the diffuser, I look crazy! So I switch shamp & cond all the time…flavor of the moment. I’m currently using Aveda Curly S&C and Curl Enhancer which is OK, plus Kevin Murphy Young Again S&C which I love but may not purchase again because of price. I wash my hair about twice/wk, & when it’s wet I add a cocktail of John Frieda Mousse, Aveda Curl Enhancer and a few drops of Moroccan Oil and scrunch it through then twist it up in a Deva towel. I haven’t found a combo I’m in love with, but you’ve all got fantastic tips…Thank you GOACA’s!

    Refreshing my hair the morning after is a challenge: I bought a silk pillowcase (I’m still wrinkly and my hair looks like Steve Harrington’s from “Stranger Things.”) I’ve tried B & B’s Curl Primer but, it’s only so-so. Ideas?

    • S. says:

      Another science Friday question: My menopausal hair actually hasn’t gotten thinner or curlier *but* I did get this sort of dead zone in the back last year that no one at the hair salon can explain. It’s just one section, and it’s turned tough and straight and hard, and the color is dull, like if you put too much product on that one spot or burned the hell out of it with a flat iron. It doesn’t break, and it doesn’t go away over time. It just keeps growing in like that.

      If the dead zone wasn’t caused by something external, it must be caused by something internal. Loss of estrogen? I do wonder if anyone else has encountered something like this. It looks like hell, though luckily since it’s about midway down it’s usually hidden by the normal layer of hair above it.

      The menopausal body is so full of surprises.

    • Susanna says:

      Interesting question. I have a friend who had ovarian cancer in her late 20s—thankfully it was detected early and she is now 25 years cancer-free. However, her hair went from stick-straight to quite wavy as soon as she had her ovaries removed, so I’m pretty sure the change from straight to curly might be the result of a lack of estrogen.

      • Mimi says:

        Your theory about the effect of a lack of estrogen is contradicted by my experience. I take a ton of estrogen to manage an autoimmune disease (interstitial cystitis.) And my hair has gone from sort of straight to wavy. Go figure.

    • DeDe says:

      IRA FLATOW!!! If there are ever any allegations against him, you guys may need to have me committed.

  27. Wendela says:

    Wait—can someone explain why a curling iron is ok but a flat iron is bad? I need to learn this stuff!!

  28. I.M. says:

    I have a decent amount of hair and it has always been straight and fine. It doesn’t hold a curl and tends to naturally fall forward into my face. It gets flat and stringy if I let it grew to my shoulders. (I’m jealous of all you curly hair girls!)

    When I was a kid, barrettes and ponytail holders used to slide out and my hair still really doesn’t hold a “hairdo” for long. In the winter my hair becomes a flyaway mess of static electricity. If I conditioned it, my hair is weighed down, flatter than it naturally is, oily and still a flyaway mess.

    I was so glad to discover new wave- precision – geometric- & pixie style haircuts. My hair, if cut correctly, is swingy, shiny, and can keep a straight-line. It’s the only thing it can do. I don’t fight my hair texture anymore. The trick was to find a hairdresser that really understood how to cut my hair and that took several years.

    I don’t use any product except Pantene shampoo in a big container from Costco and let it air dry. I’m not so great with the styling implements. If someone can recommend a conditioner that is really lightweight to tame flyaways so I don’t look like I’ve been shocked from November through early April,I’d be most appreciative.

    • AML says:

      Your hair sounds like my hair! I’ve used pantene for the longest time but their conditioner is too heavy. I recently found Peter Thomas Roth, and their conditioner is very light, I like it a lot–I have also switched to their shampoo because i feel compelled to match shampoo to conditioner.

      • I.M. says:

        Thanks for the suggestion! I’ll definitely look into it. I didn’t even know that Peter Thomas Roth made hair products

  29. Wendela says:

    (Forgot to mention: another 50 yr old here, with very fine hair that is getting maddeningly thinned out. I have been using Grifffin remedy shampoo & conditioner for a while and also sometimes Bumble and Bumble products but more recently (mostly) stopped using shampoo and just condition most of the time. Not shampooing has improved the hair loss situation a lot though it’s still an issue compared to a decade ago. My hair is wavy and can get frizzy and I love the way it looks when I blow dry it straight but it gets damaged easily and I have to save my blow dries for special occasions. Sigh. What we go through with/for our hair! If I had the time and resources to invest in extensions I would probably feel like a total boss but for now it’s not manageable. I love that you shared that you use them, Kim—it makes me feel like that is something to aspire to down the road. Thinning hair is such a lonely problem (feels like something one just can’t ask around about) so I value this discussion a lot! Thank you!!

  30. Gables girl says:

    I’m 50+ and went back to curly layered bob a few years back. It helps cover the thinning. I saw a derma/hair loss specialist and have been using women’s Rogain with great results. I use a very plain hypo allergenic shampoo and conditioner washing every few days. My favorite curly products are Leonor Greyl Hibiscus gel and Garner Curly Cream. I clip my curls up to dry. I cut/color monthly.

  31. Rosie says:

    I am so late to this, and probably my comment will fall on deaf ears, but I use Aveda products mostly because they smell so great. I have a DIL who is a some-time hairdresser and she always gives us hair products for Christmas. Last year I got a set from VERB, and that stuff is really good too. And there is another brand called Loma that I like.

    My hair is fine, straight and never curls at all, unless I set it old-fashioned on rollers. It was thin once when I had thyroid problems but now it is just like it always was. Pixie cut, highlights once every two months.

  32. I’m late to this too but my contribution is that I swear by using a microfiber towel for my hair. Cuts down the dry time dramatically and doesn’t pull my wet hair off my scalp. Also helps a bit with the frizzies. I even travel with my hair towel. It’s Aquis Essentials that I bought off Amazon years ago, still going strong. But any microfiber towel should suffice.

    I don’t use any hair products and I don’t comb/brush my hair after I wash it. I use a T3 hairdryer because my hair is so thick and takes forever to air dry. My hairline was really thinning for a few years but it stopped once I stopped taking prescription thyroid medication.